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Old 14-11-2019, 05:29 PM
AuroraFox AuroraFox is offline
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Alaska
Posts: 51
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Default Re: An Apology (of sorts)...
Originally Posted by BalloonBoyUK View Post
Well, it seems I can't say or do anything right.

AuroraFox - You said:

I have never been a Moderator here, nor will I ever be. What ever made you think I was, I don't know. Does morality not come into play, when you're dealing with people? I think it does. We all have morals, and morality plays a lot when talking about sexual fetishes. And that's what we are talking about here. Like you say, we're all "diverse and unique", but it seems you are holding me to a very different, higher standard, simply because you disagree with my views. Why? Are we not allowed to agree-to-disagree on stuff?

2) I'm not trying to "shame" others. I've never tried to shame someone on here. Where is this anger coming from? Is it purely because I post often, and hold a different view? The fact you feel I am shaming people, shows the disconnect between what I write, and how people interpret what I write. But even when I've said what my views are, people still don't believe what I say. So I'm damned either way, aren't I?!

I've tried to explain things. I've tried to apologise. I've tried to put myself into the position of others, and understand why so many people were angry at me, but I just cannot win. I'll clearly never be seen as worthy of being a member here by some of you. So be it.
I have never seen you as a Moderator so Iím not sure where that statement comes from either. I guess other users have mistaken you for one.

Hereís the thing - I will agree with you somewhat - yes, morality will come into play in many more situations than just a fetish. However, morals differ from person to person, and thatís okay. Can we have a friendly discussion about it on the forum? Yes, absolutely! But do members here want you to set your own rigid definition of morals and expect everyone to not only completely agree with you but abide by them unquestioningly? No, nobody here wants that. Thatís where the difference lies and where you are upsetting people. Everyone has their own opinion and personal standards, and just like a political discussion, standing on a soapbox will rarely, if ever, change anybodyís mind. A perfect shining example of this is the thread ďA message to all the Heterosexual males on this forumĒ, is where you have tried to force your views upon the users here. I do not like questioning the moderators, but how that thread ever got to be a sticky is beyond me. The intentions/message are in the right place, but the delivery just reeks of self-righteousness and a need to shame any differing views. One thing I do find ironic though - as much as you like to call out other male users for attempting to approach women, you yourself used to be quite the welcome wagon for female members only, as I remember.

And yes, your posts do come off as shaming others, whether you intend for them to be that way or not. Itís not because you post often, or hold a different view. Its how you handle other peopleís views. You try tirelessly to convince everyone they are wrong and why your opinion is correct, and have very long winded explanations why they should convert to your views and why you think they are wrong. Sometimes, you have to accept others will have differing opinions and just leave it at that. Nothing more.

I still donít feel as if thereís been a true apology here. Yes, youíve said the words, but statements youíve made, including (paraphrasing) ďI apologize, but I will still stand by what Iíve saidĒ and ďIíve accepted my punishment but still donít see that I did anything wrongĒ are certainly not apologies because you donít feel as if thereís any behavior to correct, and you intend to carry on as if it was business as usual. You also place the blame on everyone else for reading you wrong, but youíre responsible for your own words. A true apology would include asking what you did wrong if you truly are unaware, and taking the steps to correct that.
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