To scared to tell or ask

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  • SweetBouncer
    Senior Member
    • Mar 2020
    • 163

    #16
    Re: To scared to tell or ask

    Originally posted by shyguy
    well im single now.
    been for a little while now
    telling her didnt work out.
    i blame myself for this.
    problem is i cant c.m without seeing balloons get popped.
    im scared without.
    i feel like a freak.
    even when i tolt the truth about what i feel about her.
    how beautifull she is and that my love is real and im in love with her how she looks, how she is.
    but all that didnt matter.
    i asked what the problem was.
    Balloons she replied
    i tolt her from day one with it was
    warned her everything like please dont start this if you cant liv with this.
    but she went all in and there where no troubles she replied.
    she is now my 3rd ex Gf.. and i must say. i dont have the enegry and courage to date anymore.
    my mind is saying keep everyone away dont fall in love dont go out.
    dont get hurt.
    my first relationship ended after 8 years.
    my second ended after 2.
    my 3rd ended after 4.
    every single one said everything was fine. and when it all ended they all replied the balloons posted the biggest problems.
    im almost 31 now and affraid im gonna die alone.
    dont know what to do anymore im done beeing hurt.
    but beeing lonely hurts 2
    Hey don't worry, you don't need those fancy girls or men, just focus on how much you are winning by not having a girlfriend or boyfriend. You will have extra time, money, space, privacy, etc. With this line of thought, I've been single for a little over 10 years. I like girls and women sure, but I don't have what's required to be in a relationship, and most of the time, I don't care or need to care. I'm not asexual neither aromantic, just have some self-esteem problems.

    Also, you don't have to be afraid, better be proud, people want what they can't get. If you make yourself unmatchable, undatable, you will be like the special prize in the cereal box, unless you lose the drive to be in a relationship.

    If that is the case Welcome to Singleland, we have bigger individual portions of everything. And yes it hurts but is like chronic pain, by being always in pain you stop noticing it and it seems to disappear, and once you get used to it is a pretty cozy place to be. And hey being single doesn't mean being alone, don't forget all we are here are a community and I'm sure you have other friends, so yeah you are not alone.

    One last note, the next time you date (if you do), use what has already happened to you in advance. Tell the girl your fetish and what these other girls did to you, the truth about all and everything, and how you can't manage another girl doing the same after so much time, better early than after 2 or more years.

    Comment

    • Viper
      Back me up, Vito!
      • Jun 2021
      • 31

      #17
      Re: To scared to tell or ask

      Originally posted by shyguy
      well im single now.
      been for a little while now
      telling her didnt work out.
      Really sorry to hear that, it sucks when we have something on our mind that they just don't want to listen to us or they get upset. I honestly think it's also a defense mechanism on their part as well. We're the guy and we're not supposed to have problems, especially with them.

      I felt like chiming in on this thread since I'm half way in between the same issue but I'm squirmish to bring it up. I've been with my girl almost 10 years now so we've been through a lot and put up with a lot of crap from the other. I originally wasn't going to tell her about this fetish because it's obviously very different and not a lot of people understand it. But then she told me that she liked balloons. No actual fetish with it but just that she enjoys them. So I spilled the details about my fetish and she was just fine with it.

      In the earlier days, she'd have some fun with me. Oh God...I remember she got this one big pink punch ball that had a light in it. She blew that sucker up so big, even I was getting nervous. We played with it for a little while and then put it aside and saved it. There were a few other times we engaged in some balloon playtime and of course, good times. But then she moved in with me and now she doesn't do it anymore.

      So she does have some personal issues herself which may contribute to the problem but I really haven't had the heart to bring it up. Then she went away for a few weeks on a personal development sort of trip. Her birthday took place during the time she was away so I had got her a few things while she was away along with a card and considering it was a birthday, I put a bag of balloons she had bought a while back and put them next to the card. It's like she was totally oblivious to it. I had left them there and they sat there for a while. Now she's not always the sharpest knife in the silverware drawer but you'd think that it would've set off a few bells, ya know?

      So me too, I usually watch a few balloon videos when I'm in the mood. I always go private browsing so that it doesn't save anything on my personal YouTube account, I even browse this site in private browsing mode just to be on the safe side. She doesn't touch my stuff and it is password protected but you can never been too careful. This isn't really a deal breaker for me since we didn't get together on this premise but it's still a pain in the a** when you want a little extra fun and it doesn't happen. I still find it a bit weird to mention it as well, just like you shyguy. You don't want to sound desperate or make your woman feel like a third wheel but it's the least they can do to return the favor when we do something for them.

      Don't lose hope though. There are still plenty of fishies in the sea. If you're serious about lookin', maybe you could look on a dating website and see if you can find anyone who might be interested in balloons that could be in your area? Hey, I found my girl online by total accident and we had a LDR for quite a while. But I happened to find her on a message board and we just hit it off. So don't get discouraged because I do believe there is someone for everyone. Keep your head up!

      Comment

      • lucid
        Senior Member
        • Sep 2016
        • 275

        #18
        Re: To scared to tell or ask

        Damn Jimmy lol. That's cold-blooded stuff right there. While I agree whole heartedly that sitting down and talking about feelings with your girl isn't going to get you what you want, neither is manipulating her. Both are going to get you the opposite result of what you're looking for. In my experience, a direct approach spelling out exactly what I need while simultaneously making sure I'm meeting all her needs in the bedroom department has worked wonderfully.
        I'm sorry to hear about your breakup shyguy. That's always ruff when that happens. Just keep in mind that that's how 99 percent of every romantic relationship does indeed end up. It's definitely not a reason to give up just because you had the same outcome as everybody else. And it sounds to me like, if you've had 3 relationships, and in all three they would participate in balloon play with you initially, but then later on list that as a reason for the breakup, sounds like the balloons may not have been the whole problem. It's easy to burn your partner out on a fetish if they aren't also into it. Compare and contrast notes from these relationships and see if there is any commonality with when it went from being good, to indifferent , to adversarial. Somewhere in there you may find your answer and next time, just try not to do whatever is causing them to all of a sudden start acting differently about it. Good luck to you man I'm sure you'll pull through just fine.

        Comment

        • Ballooner99
          Junior Member
          • Jan 2016
          • 14

          #19
          Re: To scared to tell or ask

          First off, I am sorry your relationship has ended. That must be very tough. I have been reading through this thread and wanted to make a few suggestions as a married looner with a non-looner wife.

          My wife does not see balloons sexually. Let me repeat that, she does not get any sexual pleasure from playing with balloons. She doesn't think much about balloons unlike myself. If she sees a balloon and can possible save it for me, sure she will try and do that, but she wont go out of her way to do so because why would she...yes, it would make me happy, but there is more to our relationship than just balloons (which is why it is not her first thought).

          When wanting balloon fun, you will likely need to initiate it. There are only a few times she initiates balloon time simply because she doesnt think of them like we do. They are just a children's toy or party decoration to her, but recognizes I am a looner and will partake on my fetish. So expecting surprises or special balloon time out of the blue will likely not happen often. This is an unrealistic expectation and I wanted to rein in this thought process as it will lead to further relationship issues.

          My wife may go to Party City and buy me a couple balloons a few times a year (anniversary, birthday...), but rarely happens. Frankly, I wished the same as you did, but then started to think that this is unrealistic to expect her to see balloons the same as I do. It just wont happen and for me, that is okay. I ask and initiate almost all balloon play and she is happy to do so if I inflate them, clean them up and dont have them laying around the house as a constant reminder of the fetish. In fact, I used to have them scattered around (before kids) and I can say that untying or popping has helped her with balloon play since they arent always around to get annoying. To me balloons around isnt a big deal, but to a non-looner, I can see it being extremely annoying.

          So I guess my best advice here is to check your expectations and realize that to a non-looner they get nothing out of the fetish but to pleasure you. It is fairly one sided. As you noted, you felt one sided, but in reality, you are the one gaining from the experience as balloons is your turn on...not hers. There has to be some give and take and understanding that the balloons are really your thing that your girl does for you. I went down the rabbit hole thinking that balloons can be an "Our" thing, but when reflecting back on it, the only thing my wife gains with balloons is an instant turn on for me and that is it.

          Things do get better and keep your head up! I have been married for 5 years and been in a relationship with my wife for about 11 years total. It is doable! I just think (and please dont take this the wrong way) you have some growing up to do.

          Comment

          • LoonerHoax
            Senior Member
            • May 2020
            • 333

            #20
            Re: To scared to tell or ask

            Originally posted by Ballooner99
            First off, I am sorry your relationship has ended. That must be very tough. I have been reading through this thread and wanted to make a few suggestions as a married looner with a non-looner wife.

            My wife does not see balloons sexually. Let me repeat that, she does not get any sexual pleasure from playing with balloons. She doesn't think much about balloons unlike myself. If she sees a balloon and can possible save it for me, sure she will try and do that, but she wont go out of her way to do so because why would she...yes, it would make me happy, but there is more to our relationship than just balloons (which is why it is not her first thought).

            When wanting balloon fun, you will likely need to initiate it. There are only a few times she initiates balloon time simply because she doesnt think of them like we do. They are just a children's toy or party decoration to her, but recognizes I am a looner and will partake on my fetish. So expecting surprises or special balloon time out of the blue will likely not happen often. This is an unrealistic expectation and I wanted to rein in this thought process as it will lead to further relationship issues.

            My wife may go to Party City and buy me a couple balloons a few times a year (anniversary, birthday...), but rarely happens. Frankly, I wished the same as you did, but then started to think that this is unrealistic to expect her to see balloons the same as I do. It just wont happen and for me, that is okay. I ask and initiate almost all balloon play and she is happy to do so if I inflate them, clean them up and dont have them laying around the house as a constant reminder of the fetish. In fact, I used to have them scattered around (before kids) and I can say that untying or popping has helped her with balloon play since they arent always around to get annoying. To me balloons around isnt a big deal, but to a non-looner, I can see it being extremely annoying.

            So I guess my best advice here is to check your expectations and realize that to a non-looner they get nothing out of the fetish but to pleasure you. It is fairly one sided. As you noted, you felt one sided, but in reality, you are the one gaining from the experience as balloons is your turn on...not hers. There has to be some give and take and understanding that the balloons are really your thing that your girl does for you. I went down the rabbit hole thinking that balloons can be an "Our" thing, but when reflecting back on it, the only thing my wife gains with balloons is an instant turn on for me and that is it.

            Things do get better and keep your head up! I have been married for 5 years and been in a relationship with my wife for about 11 years total. It is doable! I just think (and please dont take this the wrong way) you have some growing up to do.
            Well said. I am in the same exact situation with my wife. Early on in our relationship there was more balloon play than now (14 years later). About the only sexual pleasure my wife gets from balloons is when I insert a 260Q in her. Maybe when I run a balloon against her clit, but that is more the stimulation than the object stimulating. I like to hope/dream that balloon play might pick up once our living situation improves (not living with her family).

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